Of loneliness

I once had a conversation with an acquaintance.

She told me that she is very afraid of loneliness, and hence always wanted to surround herself with lots of people.

And I told her that I was very afraid of loneliness too, and hence always sought to be away from people as much as I can.

Because the worst feeling is not that of being alone, but that of being surrounded by people and yet feeling lonelier.

Many months ago, Joel asked me why I seemed to enjoy adopting the role of a lone ranger.

I didn't know how to tell him then that I was apprehensive that being around people whom I couldn't communicate with wholeheartedly does more to enhance my sense of loneliness.

But even if I am to tell, how many will understand?

"One may defeat a thousand obstacles and adversaries, yet he who defeats the enemies within is the noblest victor. - Shakyamuni"

P.S. Oh, and I really mean it, I'll pick a shaking chair over a static one anyday, honest!!